I could have written this almost exactly, heh, except without the agent search (but my editor just left midcontract…) and I’m currently teaching full-time (and have kids and those kids have activities!). I’ve been here for a while in the “doing both” space (I’ve published five, soon to be six books traditionally with a big five publisher), so I’ll write up some advice but also just commiseration–it is very hard, and it’s pushed me close to burnout a couple times, including right here, right now. (The end of this semester cannot come soon enough.)
1) When it comes to social media and “doing all the things” to push your book: This is both depressing and freeing at the same time, but it’s very, very rare that anything we as authors can do will move the needle very much in terms of sales (and when it happens, it seems to be mostly luck). My advice…just do what you want to do and don’t worry about the rest. Want to organize a launch event? Cool, do it–but it won’t generate sales. Want to be on Insta or TikTok? Cool, but do it because it’s a fun extra, not because you think you need to. Going to cons? Only if it’s enjoyable for you and you are fine with it being a sunk cost. Take a step back and evaluate–IMO strip it all out and intentionally add in only what you WANT to do.
2) In terms of schedule–do what works for you. I see you’ve already got a “write an hour every day” person and a “early morning writer” person, so I will be contrary and say–neither of these work for me! Every semester I work up a new writing schedule (and admittedly, some work better than others!) and I hit writing hard over semester breaks when my schedule is more open. For example, for me, an hour is not sufficient to get into deep work, so an hour a day is actually far less useful to me than, say two-three hours twice a week. So that’s what I, personally, aim to do–two or three blocks per week where I’m not teaching are designated and scheduled as writing time. I get my teaching schedule and then schedule my writing blocks, and nothing else gets scheduled over those.
Part of this is know thyself–how do you write best? Some of my friends write in 20 minute sprints and knock out whole books that way. Some of my friends set aside day-long blocks a few times a month and knock out whole books that way. Maybe you really do work best intensely and all at once–so maybe cutting back on that summer side gig so you can devote a couple months to daily, intense writing could be your key (though maybe that was a one-off, and hey, fun fact, some books just demand to be written differently!). Knowing how your creative mind works and what is conducive to your best work is the key–and then schedule for it to the best of your ability. (This means saying no to other stuff sometimes, and that’s the really hard part.)
3) Writing time is for writing. Yes, checking socials, reading up on the industry, reading books in your genre are all acceptable to excellent uses of your time in a professional sense, but they aren’t writing. Reading PW will not write your next book. Updating TikTok will not write your next book. Writing your next book writes your next book. So give yourself grace on other stuff and prioritize writing time if it’s what you want.
4) I have several friends who have changed agents after publication and every one of them said–it’s much easier this time, with a publication under your belt. Try to breath easier on that, but honestly, if refreshing your email every five minutes is what this season means, hey, it’s just a season 🙂 When we’re on sub, when we’re awaiting replies from agent, when we know an edit letter is coming–some times just run on higher nerves than other times!
5) Speaking of friends–seek out some fellow writers to commiserate with. Maybe agency siblings (former siblings even!), fellow authors with your press, people you had good rapport with on Blsky, whatever. (The only truly useful thing about social media as a writer, IMO, is using it as a cocktail party where you casually meet people, then develop that connection further in email or whatever). If you have a small group, consider starting a Discord or a group chat or something so you have somewhere to offload the frustrations that non-writers don’t get, and to ask questions, and generally get support. It doesn’t solve the “not enough time in the day” problem, but it does help you see that you’re not the odd one out and everyone is struggling, and give you a place to get some support.
