Are you facing being homeless or worried you will be displaced?
Maybe you’re just curious what it’s like, what people go through, or maybe you want to help the homeless more, but don’t know how. What are their needs? What are their struggles? How can you get involved more?
Let’s tackle all these questions and more, from someone who’s been homeless twice now. This post, 30 days of being homeless, will cover my time being homeless now (not the first time I was homeless, 15-ish years ago). Most all of the post was written while I was living in a homeless shelter.
30 Days of Being Homeless
There are a ton of questions you have, I know, so let’s break them all down and take one at a time. 😊
What’s the biggest fear you have as a homeless person?
The biggest fear we have is that you won’t be able to have a place to live and you’ll end up on the street. Even if you’re lucky enough to live in a shelter, they only allow you to stay there for a certain amount of time. Once that time is over, you’re done. And that’s fair because if it wasn’t a rule, some would just mooch off the system forever.
The second biggest fear is not being able to get back on your feet. “What if I can’t find a job?” some worry. “What if I can’t find a place to live?” Finding a place to live on your income level is pretty near well impossible. It’s rough.
What are the biggest struggles you deal with?
Exhaustion. We’re just exhausted. If you live in shelter, there are rules and guidelines to obey, which is good because it keeps order in the house. But it also means you can’t just sleep when you need it. Some people who are homeless have kids and kids will be kids, running around, being wild and crazy, loud. You can’t just get extra sleep during the day when you so desperately need it and at night, you’re too worried to sleep. Sleep and rest is at the top of your priority list. Just one good night’s sleep would make all the difference, and since you ARE exhausted, it leads to a…
Lack of hope. You feel like you’ll never get through this. You can’t handle this. You can’t do this. You can’t come out on the other side. It’s too hard. You’ll never get there. So you become depressed. All is lost. Everything is over. Lack of hope is so incredibly prevalent in homeless shelters. I’ve made it my mission that while here in the shelter, I’m going to disperse hope to others and be as positive as I possibly can at all times. That maybe if they see MY hope, they will think it’ll be okay for them too; that they’ll make it through. ❤️
Worried you’ll make an enemy in shelter. You walk around on eggshells, not wanting to tick anyone off and make an enemy. If you do, you might be thrown out on the street and then what? So, you live life in fear, always being super kind to everyone so as not to offend anyone for any reason.
What does it feel like to be homeless?
Strange. You know you’re not where you were, you get that, but you don’t know where you’ll be either. One month down the line, where will I live, what city, what apartment, what place? How will my life be? Will I be okay? Will I make it through this?
Not knowing what your life will be like, the fear of the future, are all things that weigh heavily on your mind.
The lack of control is tough to deal with. You can’t just go to the bathroom when you want. You now share a bathroom with many other people. You can’t just sleep when you want. You can’t just eat when you want. Your basic freedoms like when you’ll go to the bathroom, when you’ll eat, and so on, are taken away. Lack of freedom is a harsh reality.
You also feel a lack of direction or a sense of belonging. When you have a house, you belong. You live there, it’s yours, you can count on that house every day to be there. When you’re homeless, there’s no sense of belonging, no security. The shelter you’re living in isn’t yours, and you’re not really sure what tomorrow holds or what direction your life will go in.
Right now, as I’m writing this, the ceiling in the shelter is leaking and there’s a bucket to catch the water while it rains and snows here. You have no control to fix it, no control over the place you’re living, and you don’t know what will happen next. It can be a scary place to be.
How do you survive through it?
For those that don’t have Christ with them, Idk. It’s gotta be so much tougher for sure. I’m so thankful (and blessed) that while I may not know God’s plan for me or what He’s doing, I do know that He’s here. His word says He never leaves us or forsakes us.
Are homeless people dangerous?
Actually, since genuinely homeless people (not scammers pretending to be displaced to make a buck) are so broken, hurting, exhausted, lost their basic freedoms, have no hope, and are worried all the time, you’ll actually find homeless people to be very sweet and kind. Humble. I’d much rather be friends with a homeless person than a person on the street who’s cocky, arrogant, selfish, and fighting for their own rights.
Homeless people are not dangerous. While a couple of them might be, for the most part, they are kinder because they’ve been through a lot.
Can homelessness ever be ended?
Honestly, I don’t think so. There will always be people who mooch off the system, always people who get into substance abuse, always be people who are addicted to play card games and lose everything, and there will always be bad things that happen to innocent people (and that happen to not innocent people).
There are great systems in place to help combat homelessness, but there are always people in need. The Bible tells us that in Deuteronomy 15:11. Our job as Christians is to support all those that we can, while maintaining our own livelihood. How much you give to the poor is up to you and it’s between you and God alone, however, it IS something you should ALWAYS take an active part in as Deuteronomy 15:11 commands as well as Proverbs 31:20 suggests as we line our lives up to being the Proverbs 31 woman.
Should I give homeless people cash?
It’s generally not a good idea. They can use the cash to purchase bad things (drugs, alcohol, addictions, cigarettes, etc.). Most legit homeless people do not mind at all if you pay a bill, for example, or provide them with their needs instead. It’s not offensive to them at all, they understand and are just grateful for ANY help whatsoever.
They will happily give you their bill information (company name, account number, etc.) and you can call and verify that payment directly with the company. If its needs, they will happily tell you what they need or make you a list of items they need. Again, any help at all is very much appreciated to the homeless person you’re helping!
Where do homeless people live?
It really depends on what you have. I spent a couple days in my car. I spent a couple days in motel rooms to shower and do laundry. And now, I’m living in a homeless shelter and am truly blessed to be here. Although it’s rough, I’m not on the street and I’m very thankful!
Others live on couches, in storage units, the streets, parks, abandoned railway cars, motels, tent cities, abandoned buildings, etc.
What leads people to being homeless?
It varies. While some is because of drugs or crime, a lot of it is domestic violence. A woman has to get out and she has to get out NOW (that was why I was homeless 15 years ago)!
Some of it is unforeseen circumstances. I was selling a house, couldn’t afford my monthly payments anymore, the lender gave me 3 days to get out and couldn’t finish selling the home. I ended up homeless. It wasn’t my fault and there was nothing I could do to prevent it.
Don’t the homeless people have friends and family to help them?
I can say with full honesty, USUALLY, homeless people are trying to get AWAY from family. For example, a husband physically abuses his wife and children for years and finally the wife snaps. She ends up protecting herself, standing up for herself, hitting back, etc. and SHE ends up in jail for spousal abuse. She was too scared to go to the police when he was abusing HER but now that she did something, she’s in jail and when she gets out, she can’t go back to him, she’s homeless. It’s not right, but it happens more than you think. So in a case like that, she’s trying to get away from the family.
Maybe she’s too scared to go to her parents, maybe it’s not safe to go to her parents, maybe she doesn’t have parents. My parents are both deceased and I have no siblings. It’s just me. Sometimes, friends leave at the first sight of someone needing help, so they don’t have friends. That happens a lot, and so they are left on their own.
Maybe they go to their sibling for help, but the sibling has their own family to take care of, doesn’t have room to spare for a mom and her 4 kids to stay and so the mom has to go stay at a homeless shelter.
So it’s not always that a homeless person has friends and family to help them or if they have someone, sometimes the person is in a position where they just can’t help the homeless person. Usually, the homeless person will go to a shelter as the last resort type of thing, after exhausting all other avenues.
What’s it like for people to live in a homeless shelter?
I see ladies going to work every day, staying at the shelter to save their money up to get an apartment. Kids going on the school bus to go to school. Littler babies being watched by their moms all day. Some are motivated to leave shelter, working hard to put a life together, others are milking the system, watching TV all day, not really doing anything. Each person is completely different.
How’s the food at shelter?
It really depends. Every Monday we get a delivery from the Food Bank and Albertson’s (thank you Albertson’s!) giving us fresh, soon-to-be-expired food. Things like organic arugula salad to cakes to milk to all different kinds of things.
There’s a lot of shelf-stable things, a pantry full of not-expired cases of food. Cans of corn, veggies, mashed potatoes in cups, mac and cheese, cereal bars, and so on.
There’s a couple freezers full of items like cheese and expired meats that no one here touches. 😆
If you get creative, you can make meals. They will deliver things like raw green onions and eggs. Make an omelet. You have to be real creative and learn to go without some basic things you take for granted.
The other night, I ate a can of tuna right out of the can, no mayonnaise. There isn’t any mayo. You do what you gotta do. It wasn’t pleasant, but…it was food.
Some people buy their own food and use it in addition to shelter food. Get mayo for example and have a tuna sandwich. Some people buy chips or cans of soda, some buy bottled water, just the things they really want to have but is not offered.
You really just have to look at expiration dates and know what to eat and what not to, otherwise, you’ll get sick. There are a lot of sicknesses going around too, because lots of kids. Right now, there are 13 kids in the shelter I’m staying at and strep throat is going around. It’s inevitable you’ll get sick, no matter how careful you are and it goes around and around and around and cycles through several times. There’s not really anything you can do about it.
The workers take people out to the grocery store and grocery shop with them, offering them rides to and from and helping. That’s super nice. They take them to appointments and things like that. It’s a very service-driven job and it makes me so happy to see the workers serve.
How long do they let you stay in the shelter?
Each shelter will have different rules. When I was homeless 15 years ago, the homeless shelter only allowed us to stay there for 30 days and I stayed there three weeks. Now, they let us stay there 90 days, and I stayed there 10 days.
The same shelter was a very different vibe the first time. It was a lot more quiet and peaceful. This last time, it was chaotic mad house crazy morning, day, and usually at night. Several were way too much drama, way too much unnecessary noise, people losing their tempers, screaming, causing drama purposely, gossiping like you wouldn’t believe, watching TV programs that were offensive to a Christian (people having sex, cussing non-stop, etc.) Staying there was proving to bring me DOWN instead of lifting me up.
The first time I stayed there, there were Christians helping you find your way with God, super sweet and taking the time to help us emotionally, morally, spiritually; there was none of that this time.
There wasn’t any godly influence, no Christian support. In fact, we had to sign a paper that we wouldn’t cause trouble for anyone who was gay, etc. And I agree, no one should be attacked for how they are and we understand that. We don’t agree with their lifestyle as believers, but we don’t cause trouble or attack people to be mean at all. That’s not God’s way. They have a right to choose how they want to be, just as I have a choice to believe in Jesus or not. Everyone has that freedom to choose heaven or hell and that’s okay. I get it, but it sure has changed since I was there last.
The ladies who stay there aren’t learning life skills that will actually help them become better people and become an asset to society. They are basically allowed to get away with whatever they wanna do, even if that’s constantly screaming, yelling, and cussing at their kids. It was really tough. I just wanted to grab the kids and hold them, hug them, and pour over them KIND words and love!
It’s not a place you’ll want to stay for a long time. It’s pretty rough. You’ll want to use the place to get on your feet, sleep for the night, get your life together and get the heck out of there!!!! 😆
It’s chaos and some people get real mean and attack others. I had one lady, didn’t like me for whatever reason (idk why?), turn the shower head at me so when I turn on the shower, got wet from the shower head being turned toward me. She was looking around for ways to sabotage me and I saw it. When that happened, I knew I was safer on the street than there in that homeless shelter and I had to leave. So, I left in peace and got out as quickly as I could.
What help does the shelter offer?
Each shelter is different. In the one I’m in, it’s for domestic violence, and so the workers help us apply for restraining orders with the courts and things like that. They take people without cars to appointments, grocery shopping, etc.
They give you funds to help you get a place. For example, they pay a couple hundred dollars for your deposit to get an apartment.
They have classes you can learn things like how to get a copy of your SSN card, birth certificate, all that, just not any life skills stuff or things that will help you put your life together.
They offer Thanksgiving and Christmas intakes. So for Christmas, someone will adopt me and bring me presents, meet needs, and buy a whole dinner, etc. If you stay with them any time during the year, they do this, not just at the holidays. It’s really, really sweet of them.
They are definitely here to help and care about people. It’s such a relief to see people care about each other. I’m coming from Idaho where EVERYONE is “Look out for numero uno. Idc, move, you’re in my way”, type of thing. I really hated Idaho and the people there. Most all are just jerks and some pretend to care (faking) but really don’t. It’s all just for show. I hated it.
What’s one thing I’d never guess about living in a shelter?
You have chores. Every day, you have a list of chores you have to get done by a certain time of day and everyone is responsible for those chores.
So like in the mornings, we wake up whatever time we want, do our chores, then go to class (8 am-8:15 am) to check in with the workers and tell them where we’re at, what we’re doing for the day, our plans, all that. Communication is key.
Secondly, you can’t just leave when you want. For safety, you have to get it approved if you want to leave. Even if it’s an errand or appointment. It must be approved and logged on the time sheet so that the workers always know where you’re at. They need to. Like if there’s a fire or something, they need a head count and need to know what’s going on.
How can I help homeless people more?
Lemme write you a list! haha.
- Don’t judge them. You don’t know their situation. It’s not always just drugs or criminal activity. Bad stuff happens to everyone!
- Give to them the things they need. Toiletries are the first things they usually need. Things you take for granted like garbage bags, towels for showers, laundry soap, socks, and tissue boxes. I need a shaver and shaver gel SO bad right now!! 😆 We only get one towel here for showers and we get one day a week to do laundry. You do the math there. If you’re taking a shower, you’re using the same towel and air drying it out till your laundry day. You can also give other things like gift certificates to fast food, hand wipes, sunscreen, toothbrush/toothpaste, nail clippers, nail files (cardboard type so they are not used as a weapon), bandaids, chapstick, hair brush / comb, mints, gum, gloves / hats / winter supplies, etc.
- Be kind to them. They won’t tell you their whole life story. They usually won’t talk about their situation at all. The one lady that told me what happened to her said that her husband “accidentally” shot her in the foot. Just know, it take real guts to make it out on the other side of being homeless. Give them some credit and be kind!
- Donate to causes in your community that helps the homeless. If you don’t trust where the money actually goes, then drive out a big batch of UNexpired food to the shelter on a weekly basis. They will surely appreciate that! Have extra clothes laying around? Donate them to the shelter. Toiletries, towels and washcloths, garbage bags, and small cheapy garbage cans are all things they usually need too.
- Make them a hot meal. They are often malnourished because of a lack of food. Making them a hot meal is most likely what they miss most from having a home.
It doesn’t take a whole lot to brighten the smile of a homeless person. Sometimes, it’s just a listening ear or meeting a need they have. They’re not looking for the world and their expectations are so low. Give to them in abundance and help wherever you can.
How can I help homeless shelters more during the holidays?
Great question. During the holidays, the homeless shelters try to give gifts and necessities to all that have stayed with them or are staying with them. The shelter I stayed in adopts the homeless people who have stayed there throughout the year. They give a big meal, gifts, and necessities and it’s all EXTREMELY helpful to the people!
- Call and ask what the homeless shelter’s unique needs are/what they’re looking for this holiday season
- Cash donation
- Run a food drive and gift all food to them
- Purchase brand new PJ sets, hygiene products, toiletries, and beauty supplies and donate them
- Adopt a family or two within their shelter
- Purchase some Christmas stockings and fill them with little presents and mark if they are for a boy/girl and ages they would be good for and give to the shelter
- Bring brand new, unwrapped presents to the shelter for adults, teens, children, and babies
- Volunteer to pass out meals or help out with your time in other ways (ask what they need specifically)
If you prepare a little early and start collecting throughout the year, you can donate quite a bit. Finding things on clearance as you shop is great. Another example is right after winter, some stores usually have baby snowsuits for only $5 each that were $60 retail at department stores like JC Penney’s, Sears, etc. You can grab them in bulk and save them for the next year. Same with Black Friday, lots of great deals you can grab and help with the things that they are in need of.
Never worry about buying something they won’t need. They can use absolutely everything you gift! There are plenty of people in need and every single thing you donate, they are wonderful stewards of, they will find a person in need for it!!!
What Thanksgiving or Christmas food items could they use most?
- Pumpkins
- Yams
- Cranberries
- Fried Onions
- Ham
- Turkey
- Canned Fruit
- Olives
- Jello
- Pie Crust
- Pie Filling
- Marshmallows
- Stuffing
- Gravy
- Evaporated Milk
- Condensed Milk
- Rolls
- Bread Mix
- etc.
What are some favorite foods to donate all year round?
Things that kids like to help their transition go a little bit smoother. Honestly, I think it’s hardest on the kids. Their whole world turns upside down, they have no control over anything, they see mom struggling, and all the sudden they lose EVERYTHING.
One lady I knew in the shelter, her son was really struggling with everything and at school, he was jumped and beat up by three boys (it broke my heart!) He was dealing with so much, not only being homeless and everything that goes with that, but kids at school too.
The kids in the homeless shelter really loved frozen pizzas, snack bites, cookies, granola bars, treats, pudding cups, soda cans, juice, fruit snacks, etc.
Anything that has a long shelf life or is not expired is also great. More ideas are…
- Tuna Cans/Pouches (buy them mayonnaise!)
- Cheese
- Milk
- Pre-Made or Ready-Made Dinners
- Applesauce Cups
- Crackers
- Chips
- Oatmeal
- Bacon Bits (are pretty universal, can be used in a lot of things)
- Mashed Potato Pouches
- Canned Fruit (no one really ate the canned veggies)
- Bread
- Fresh Fruit (everyone loved that)
- Cereal
- Salad Dressing
- Bottled Water (many are trying to stay healthy and LOVE the bottled water)
- Soda Cans
- Pretzels
- Raviolis
- Pasta Noodles
- Spaghetti Sauce
- Canned Soups
- Canned Corn
- Hamburger Helper Type Meals
- Peanut Butter and Jelly (but no one really ate that, not even the kids)
- Macaroni and Cheese Boxes
- etc.
What can I donate to relief the financial burden of the homeless shelter itself?
A lot of things they go through super quick are…
- Toilet Paper
- Paper Towels
- Feminine Hygiene Products
- Laundry Soap / Tabs
- Bounce Dryer Sheets
- Small Garbage Cans (to put one in each room; people tend to take them when they move out)
- Trash Bags (13-gallon kitchen size and small bathroom-size also)
- Dish Soap
- Scrubbing Pads
- Diapers (for all sizes)
- Cleaning Supplies (bleach, mirror sprays, floor cleaners, disinfectant wipes, etc.)
- Tissue Boxes (many people are crying a lot, so those are needed)
- Shampoo and Conditioners
- Bar Soap
Other things they needed where I was is: hair dryers, bath towels, washcloths, and box fans.
What did your time look like while you were homeless? (2024)
Day 1: Packed up the car with everything that would possibly fit (bought space bags to save room on clothes and so more would fit in my car) and headed out on the road. A couple I just met used their points on a hotel and got me a 2-night stay at a nice hotel in the city I drove to. I did my laundry there, showered, ate snack foods, and slept as much as humanly possible because I was pretty exhausted!
Day 3 and 4: Was driving around all day, living in my car. Trying to find a safe motel, trying to find an apartment. Looked at an apartment in another city 5 hours away (Happy Valley, OR) but it was not a good one by any standard, so I came back.
Day 5: Slept in a motel that night and slept well. Exhausted. Spent the day resting over looking for a place due to exhaustion.
(Nov 15) Day 6: Got into the homeless shelter; praise the Lord. Have my own room, my own bed, and am trying to catch up on sleep. Am still exhausted.
Day 7: In the homeless shelter, immediately picked right back up where I was when I had a house and started working my blog and printables shop. Working it around 12 hours a day to build income and serve you guys. ❤️ I am trying to apply for food stamps so I have food to eat when I get out of shelter and trying to apply for medical as well. That will take a few days. Looking at all the possible places online in order to find a place to stay for a while.
Staying on top of my oils too so I don’t go into depression! Deep Blue (doTerra) is great for feelings of grief. I just put one drop on the top of my hand a couple times a day, as needed. As I start to feel sad, hopeless, I take it. Another good one for depression is Melissa oil. It’s a bit more spendy and not what I’m taking at the moment but it’s for when you feel suicidal. The other good oil to take is Lemon oil. It just helps with clarity, concentration, if you’re low on iron (anemic), it’ll help that too, it’s just a good one to take to brighten your mood. So Lemon and Deep Blue are what I’m taking now every day through all this.
Day 8-15: Was working super hard in the shelter, day and night. Keeping up with all my chores there, trying my best to hold onto my hope so as to encourage the other ladies in there who were dealing with a lot, but it was just too crazy at the shelter…like a mad house 24/7. There were quiet times later at night, which helped, but it became super hard to work with people coming and going, losing their tempers, screaming, throwing fits (and not just the kids!) 😮 I knew I had to leave, so I started working all the more to earn money to be able to move out while I wait for an apartment to open up.
(Nov 25) Day 16: Today, I was able to find a place online, a studio apt (month-to-month). It’s about double the amount of rent of the apartments I’m trying to get into but having my own bathroom, picking up after ONLY myself, and not being in such a HOSTILE environment will be all worth it! I love the new studio. It’s decorated really cute and the landlords are SUPER nice, very accommodating. Only problem is, it’s super cold. Like….ice cold. So we’re working on getting it warmer in here, putting more heaters, the landlords put some more insulation in the walls, etc. The shelter also gave me a small box of food to take with me before I left (HOW cool is that?!!!!) so I didn’t have to worry about today’s meals, I could just eat something from the food box and in moving all day, making trips back and forth from one place to the other, it was a life saver! The worker’s name there is Sarah, just like my name, and she was super sweet, always kind and helpful, genuinely cared. It was a joy to know her and I’ll miss her!
Day 17-18: Today I realized that sometimes, especially when you’re going through something horrific, a huge massive life change, sometimes, you just look for the smallest of “win’s”. It’s really the ONLY thing you can do. If you’re in such a situation where you’re dealing with something harsh, just keep putting one step in front of the other, just take ONE day at a time, one hour if need be, one “win” at a time.
One day that may be doing something as simple as your laundry, or some other project or need you have. But just figuring out, one by one, how to take care of and accomplish each need, each little thing, and that’s okay! As you take care of each thing, you’ll feel accomplished. Wow, 😆 if you had ever of told me I’d feel accomplished to just do laundry one day, I wouldn’t have believed you! 😂 But it’s true. When you’re in this kind of situation, it really does become about the small “wins” you have over each and every small little thing you used to take for granted. ❤️
I was approved for medical insurance also (food stamps I need to have an interview for on January 7, so will take some more time), but I’m thankful for medical because I want to go to the doctor and have a checkup. I haven’t been to a traditional doctor (I see a holistic doc/naturepath regularly) in well over 10 years. I get to get my teeth cleaned free too, which is nice, because usually I just pay like $100 out of pocket every 6 months. Things are starting to fall into place a little bit. I can see the wheels turning, I can see God is with me, guiding me, leading me, we’ll see where He takes me tomorrow. 🥰
(Nov 28) Day 19: Today is Thanksgiving. They were planning a big meal in the shelter and because I’m not there I don’t get to be a part of it. That’s okay, but I don’t have any family at all and I’m in a completely new city and state and it feels pretty sad today. I cried. I feel all alone. After I cried and was praying through everything, just casting my burdens upon the Lord (He said He would speed up my process for me while I was praying to Him, so that is nice; looking forward to see it sped up!!!), a little bit later, like maybe an hour, the landlord brings me a plate of Thanksgiving food. It was that one kind thing she did that really made today go from a bad day to a good day and here’s what I want to say…
We have the power to change someone’s day! Even if it’s just one day, one small, kind thing you do can really make all the difference in someone’s day! We should all strive, every single day, to make at least one person’s day better. To do at least one kind thing, because it really DOES make a difference! Today, I’m grateful I’m out of the shelter and in my own (transitional) place. I’m thankful for the blog, for all of you. Most importantly, I’m thankful for God. I know that if He wasn’t here and I had to do this alone, I couldn’t. I need Him in everything I do, in the good AND in the bad, I need Him.
Thank you, Lord for being there for each one of us. Because life is hard and we ALL suffer, and you’re always there, no matter what, through the good and through the bad, you never leave us. You genuinely care, genuinely love us, and you’re making a way for all of us, each and every day, even when we don’t feel it or see it. You’re working “hard” in the background to lead and guide us. Thank you.
Day 20: Today is Black Friday and so I’m spending my money UBER wisely and getting things that I know I’ll need as soon as I get to an apartment that are on major sale right now. One of those things is a crockpot. Those things are a good $50 new and you can’t rarely find sales on them, so I found one at $24 and snagged it. Got an office chair on sale too. Just a couple things I’ll need that I could get some great deals at.
(Nov 30) Day 21-25: This week, I’m focusing on getting into a routine. Every day is a battle to just do the simplest things. Washing my clothes by hand because there’s no washer/dryer around here, for example. It’s not so bad, but having a daily routine so there’s some normalcy in my life and things are a bit more streamlined and peaceful, will really help! 😊
(Dec 5) Day 26: I definitely feel a lot better physically. Things are starting to settle down, needs are being met, normalcy is happening, and my mind is just starting to realize/accept that I’m not living in the homeless shelter anymore. I can breathe a little bit. I even got to sleep in the past couple days, which was really nice, since I’ve been so exhausted with what I’ve been through. Sleeping is nice, laying down and resting is nice. It feels good to rest! Still getting my work done, of course, 🥰 but I have taken it easy the past couple days and I gotta say…I REALLY needed it. I could use another week of rest and I think I’ll be good again, so this week, just going to continue focusing on meeting needs and taking care of things that need to be taken care of, settling into a routine, working and doing my website like always, and resting.
Day 27: Christmas is coming up here in a few weeks and it feels so weird not having a Christmas tree or decorating anything. I see inside home windows they have a tree and I think to myself, “That’s normal”. It just feels so weird not having that this year. This is my first year that I don’t have anything for Christmas. I can’t decorate where I’m at, nor do I have the money or time (I need to rest and focus on my work right now), but it does feel a little sad without anything.
All I can think about is how my son was physically abusing me and I gave him to his dad to live with so the abuse would stop and how I’m glad I did. I had a feeling I would become homeless, things seemed to be going in that direction and I was worried that if I DID become homeless, I didn’t want my son to go through it with me. So today, my praise is as simple as that. I’m glad that my son didn’t have to go through this with me, cuz it’s not the funniest thing in the world. 😆
I know that it probably sounds a little silly, but I think it’s really important as we are going through REALLY tough things, to keep our eyes on the bright side, to remain joyful, to not lose that. It’s important for my own sanity to keep my mind on being thankful, but also for Christ. He’s there for me, in the good and in the bad. No matter what, He’s always there and I’m thankful that I have a God who never leaves me. Who loves me that much that when things get tough, He doesn’t check out. He’s there. I feel His presence, He’s leading and guiding me and it feels good to have some answers, to see what He’s doing. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me (Philippians 4:13). I feel very blessed. Blessed to have God. Blessed He’s on my side. Blessed He’s leading and guiding me now, making my path straight. Blessed. I’m very blessed. 🙌
Day 28-30: It sounds very much like God is leading me to Albany, Oregon, where I’ve wanted to get back to, for 15 years. It could very well be that one of the reasons (other than glorifying Him, of course) is that He wanted me to lose everything in order to lead me back here to Albany and it’s really a blessing in disguise. I’m not sure what will happen, but just trying to let Him lead me and do whatever He wants me to do!
